April 30, 2009

I want to begin with a testimony of God's amazing love and comfort. Today was a really tough day, but the Lord gave us what we needed to get through each hour as he has done since March 26th when I was rushed to Montgomery. Sam is doing pretty good for what he has been through today. As you have read, they were feeding him every 3 hours. At each feeding time, they measure his tummy to make sure that it isn't getting too big too fast. A sudden increase in the measurements could mean many things like infection, gas, or intestinal problems (to name a few because I can't remember all of the things they told me). Sam's belly measurements had increased a good bit when his nurse checked him around 5 am (his belly was swollen). The NICU's protocol for changes like this is to immediately stop all feedings, start fluids through an IV, take xrays of the abdomen, get blood for labs, begin antibiotics, and put a tube down the throat into the tummy to suction any gases or other stuff in there. So, that is what happened this morning. When the nurse called me she couldn't really tell me anything because the doctor had not looked at the xrays. When I got there this morning it was very difficult because Sam looked pitiful with no clothes on and a tube back down his throat and the IV in his hand, not to mention all of the little taped gauze where they had to stick him to draw blood. He was very hungry and unhappy. I felt helpless because I couldn't hold him to try to console or even kiss his little head.





It wasn't very long until the doctor called me over to talk about what was going on with Sam. He pulled up the xray and tried to explain what they were looking at in his stomach. All of the things that they began early this morning (antibiotics, suctioning, fluids, etc.) were precautionary measures to prevent NEC. NEC is necrotizing enterocolitis which is a very serious disease. NEC is an inflammation that damages the lining of the intestine. He told me that babies die from NEC so they would first work hard to rule that out using the xrays and lab work over the next couple of days. The doctor thinks that this happened to Sam because he stopped tolerating his food because his intestines are still premature. As a preemie, all of Sam is premature and some things just aren't ready to do what the doctors are wanting to do. They did another xray at 3pm today and it did look better than the one at 5am. They will do another xray in the morning to compare. He did have several dirty diapers once they moved him back to the other side and hooked him up to everything. They said that these were good signs and that his vitals were still strong. The nurses told me that he wasn't "acting sick" and that was also a good sign. He was very hungry and sucking on his pacifier. Now we are just waiting on more test results. Sam will probably be on this side a little while as we start over with every thing. He will start back in an isolette with his IV and a feeding tube at some point. His feedings will begin at 2ccs when they decide to begin feedings again. It could be several days. My heart just broke when I saw him rooting around for something to eat and I couldn't help him, but I know that all of this is in his best interest and is helping to keep more serious things from happening. I can't wait until they let me hold him again.





Although it has been a really long day for Sam and me, I was reminded of many things today in the midst of the worry. Since we are back over where Sam began his journey on March 31st I looked around and saw babies smaller than his 3 lbs 9 oz body hooked up to all sorts of machines. There is a baby across the room that weighs around 1 lb. God really got my attention and I began to recall how far He has brought us in 4 weeks. We have SO much to be grateful for even though we have a minor set back. We have a beautiful baby boy that I've had the chance to nurse several times and feed bottles to for several days. We've been able to hold him and love on him for several weeks and listen to his sweet little sounds and see his little smiles. I remember just wanting to see his eyes and hear him make a sound. It's overwhelming to think about how concerned God is for his children and how He hears us when we cry out to Him. To see His hand moving in our lives is an humbling thing. I know that this did not catch God by surprise and that He is still in control even though I felt like I was caught in a raging storm this morning. He is so good! Please continue to lift Sam up in your prayers. I'm praying that the test results show that he doesn't have NEC and that he will recover quickly from this little set back.

These pictures show how far we've come and the blessings that have been poured out on us.